My Aspartame Story.

I'm fat. Yeah, that's right. I'm fat. I've been on a diet since I was born, even when I WASN'T fat, because I thought I was. I'm also middle-aged.

Oh, and I am allergic to excercise, too.

Is it any wonder I felt like crap? I mean, I felt really, really bad. All the time. I kept telling the doctor I feel so tired all the time, more than I think I should for my age. The doctors always just told me to eat less, excercise more. And frankly, that seemed reasonable. So I felt like crap, and hated myself for feeling like crap because I put myself in this position, and then felt like crap even more.

But, still...I just kept wondering if it wasn't more than just middle-aged fatness. I mean, why did I wake up with a headache, EVERY SINGLE MORNING. My right hip hurt sooo much, that some days I had to lean on my husband to walk because it hurt so much! Arthritis-like. I remember thinking to myself, I'm going to be in a wheelchair before I hit 50. My body just seemed to be deteriorating so fast. My neck was always stiff, and sore. When I'd stand up from a chair, or from the bed, I'd have to stand still for a few moments before I could get moving because my muscles were so stiff. I drank caffeine like crazy to clear the cobwebs, because some days I just couldn't focus.

And then my "insides" hurt, too. Not exactly pain, but just uncomfortable. You know when you've been running or riding a bike, and you stop suddenly, how your leg muscles feel? That special kind of tired in your muscles? My ORGANS felt like that. I can't explain it, but I couldn't take a truly deep breath, and it just seemed as if the tissues in my organs were as stiff as my muscles. That's the best I can explain it. Not pain, exactly, but an AWARENESS of my innards, like something's not right.

I've been looking for an explanation for a long, long time. And I was very afraid. If I'm only 43, and I'm this stiff and sore from being out-of-shape, how much worse will I feel when I'm 50? 60? I genuinely envisioned being wheel-chair bound.

Now, the next part of the story is, just like eveyone else, I get those emails that have been passed around the internet a million times, screaming a warning about whatever the latest fear is. I'm sure you've seen them. I probably saw an email about the "DANGERS OF ASPARTAME!!!!" 15 times and deleted it along with all the other spam emails without giving it a second glance.

But then the 16th one I read. And after I read it, I thought, "oh whatEVER!!!!" And promptly deleted it. But I kept thinking about it. And I KEPT thinking about it. And then a few weeks later, I dug that email out of my deleted folder and read it again...

I really READ it. I looked at the list of side effects of Aspartame poisoning, and I began to wonder if there might not be some merit to the whole thing.

Being perpetually on a diet, I drank diet soft drinks, and ate light yogurt and sugar-free jello. And because I'm a fan of my own teeth, I chose sugar-free gum, mints and lozenges. I ingested Aspartame every day. I drank 1 to 4 Diet Cokes a day, and then had other sugar-free snacks. So I thought, there's only one way to tell, why don't I just try it for 14 days. Just switch back to regular soda, regular yogurt and jello and just see for myself? I have nothing to lose, and if it works, GREAT!

So, I had my last Diet Coke at 9am on a Monday morning. 24 hours later, the very next morning, I woke up without a headache. That evening, at 36 hours, I stood up out of bed real quick to go to the bathroom, and I saw that I could immediately begin walking instead of having to "steady myself" first. Within the week, all the arthritis-like joint pains, including the really bad one in my hip were VASTLY improved. The muscle weakness and stiffness were improving.

Oh, and did mention the incontinence? That slight little dribble-dribble that comes with middle age for most women? Yeah, it ain't fun to talk about, especially to the whole world! But you should know, the toxins from Asparatame permeate every single cell in your body, and that includes the bladder AND it's gasket. They weren't functioning as they were meant too, either, and THAT problem went away! There are women out there who take MEDICINE to stop bladder leaks, when all it might take is to give up artificial sweeteners!

I also regained mental clarity, lost the ringing in my ears, my vision even seemed just a little sharper. And the list goes on and on. All of this transpired a year ago.

But I really, genuinely, came to believe in my heart of hearts after today's realization. Here's the rest of the story.

Last week, my symptoms started coming back. I noticed the hip pain first, and then the daily headache, and then arthritis-like joint pain...I was VERY upset, VERY disheartened. Could I have been wrong? Is it all really related to old-age and fat? I even suspected someone might have been secretly slipping Equal into my regular sodas just to see if I noticed (because I talk about this all the time). Well I did notice. And I spent last Sunday poring over every thing in my fridge, maybe I accidently picked up a "light" yogurt along with the regular ones? I searched and searched, and then BAM! I realized what was happening. One week ago, I began to diet in earnest again. I even excercised if you can believe it!! And it occurred to me that because I'm dieting, my body is beginning to use the energy stored in my fat cells, AND RELEASING THE TOXINS STORED THERE TOO!!! So, of course my body is reacting the same way to that surge of toxins being re-introduced to my bloodstream! What a relief, but then again, not. Because I am determined to stick to the diet, and that means a lot of toxins being released from a lot of fat cells, and a long duration of dealing with it. But oddly, it makes me more determined to stay on my diet to rid myself not just from my fat, but also the toxins stored IN that fat. It's really pissing me off, and I'm determined not to let ASPARTAME win!

I am not a doctor, I am not a scientist, I am not a dietician. All I can do is relate my own personal experience, and hope it helps someone else. Here's the simple basics of the whole thing. Aspartame is not a food, it is a chemical. And when it enters your body, it breaks down into formaldehyde and formic acid. And THAT is what's making you feel like crap. And those toxins are stored in every single cell your body. Affecting every function of your organs, your glands, your endocrine system. Every THING and every FUNCTION in your body is affected. Again, all I can do is try my best to convince you that what I experienced is real. After today's revelation about why my symptoms were returning, I am 100%, beyond a shadow of a doubt, convinced that Aspartame was my problem. And that it is bad, bad news.

There are LOADS of websties about Aspartame Poisoning. Here are a few:

For symptoms: http://www.sweetpoison.com/aspartame-side-effects.html

How Aspartame Poisoning mimics other diseases and is often mis-diagnosed: http://www.healthy-holistic-living.com/aspartame-poison.html

How Aspartame got pushed through the FDA: http://proliberty.com/observer/20040604.htm

If you have symptoms you just can't explain, please just give it a try. Just one week, read every label on everything you eat, and if it contains aspartame OR sucralose, just choose something else that is made with regular sugar. I understand if you're a healthy skeptic who doesn't believe everything you read, I am too. So don't take my word for it, just try it to see for yourself. You have nothing to lose if it doesn't work, and if it does work, you'll feel great!

Good luck.

Do I Cut the Red Wire, or the Blue Wire?

I have to make a decision that may blow up in my face.

In this ticking time-bomb of an economy, we’re all concerned for our jobs, and our families’ futures. And just like so many millions of other regular people, I live paycheck-to-paycheck. And THAT means I’m just one unemployed month away from homelessness. Saving money is a great idea on paper, but in the real world, most of us don’t make enough to save AND pay the bills. And if your luck is like mine, if you do find yourself sitting on, ohhhh....say $400 with no earmarks, and you open a savings account, the car breaks down and it’s a $600 repair. It happens to me every time! I almost would rather NOT save money, because at least when I’M broke, nothing else is.

So, here’s my dilemma: With lay-offs looming large on my horizon, do I stay at my job until the bitter end and hope I survive the cut? Or do I jump ship now, and start looking for a new job at a company that’s hiring? I mean, if I wait until I’m laid off, and THEN start looking for a job, it could take weeks. And unemployment compensation in my state is the same for everyone, very little, and only about a third of my current pay. Counting on that to see my family through is simply NOT an option! But if I start looking now, and actually find a job at a company that’s hiring, I could wind up with a job that’s a wrong fit.

So, which is it?

The red wire - where I stay at my job, (which I LOVE, by the way), holding on in breathless, white-knuckled despair until things ease up?

Or the blue wire - where I find a new job now, and wind up in breathless, white-knuckled despair working for a boss who’s turned out to be Buttholius Maximus.

The red wire - stay at my job hoping the company survives, giving everything I have in the way of prayer, good vibes, positive thinking, sacrifice and elbow grease, only to see the company tank and lose my job anyway?

Or the blue wire - where I LEAVE my current job in order to avoid a possible lay-off, only to see the company make it through with flying colors and leave my ship-jumping, disloyal self in the dust?

Ah, but I forgot! In the movies, when the guy looks at his partner for a decision, red or blue, he always chooses the THIRD option…the green wire!

My green wire - my third option - is to move to Scottsdale.

At least that way, when I end up homeless and living under a bridge, it will be a nicely landscaped, fashionable one, with a great view!

Best Grammy Show in YEARS!

I haven't enjoyed a Grammy show as much as last night's (02.08.2009), in as long as I can remember. I'm a musician, and some years I even SKIP watching it because I know it's going to be so very, very bad. (read: the years when the Britney types were the rage).

Last night was such an amazing array of real TALENT! The first knock out punch came early, "Let's Stay Together" with Al Green, Justin Timberlake, Boyz II Men, and Keith Urban.How great was THAT! I've been blessed with having been in a band and performing onstage. And I've been there for that moment, when a group of people are playing a piece of music, where you can feel everyone slide into a groove, lining up in sync with each other, and the song takes over. You are no longer performing the song, the song performs itself and you are the instrument. Fantasia had that moment when she sang "Summertime" on Idol, and that amazing ensemble of musicians had that moment last night. I said to my husband "They need to release the recording of that performance as a single for radio play!" Well done! It was a joy to watch AND hear!

Now, I know this is going to pigeonhole me as out-of-touch and middle-aged, but I've never been a fan of rap or hip-hop. Don't get me wrong, I like edgy music with a message, but I'll take grunge for that. (I was never so musically satisfied as I was during the 90's.) However, amongst the newcomers such as Duffy and Adele, the hip-hop just seemed so......Tired. Done. Over. Hip-hop and rap have just devolved into a caricature. The best of that group, Queen Latifah, Diddy, Ice-T, have all attained more "grown-up" careers. What's left just seems like a big waste. I've never even heard of M.I.A. before last night, (I KNOW! I'm OLD!), but what in the HELL was she wearing?! She looked like an idiot. Period.

And what does everyone feel like the only way to gain street cred is to have an angry rapper chime in on their song? That's another supposedly shocking arrangement that's been done to death. Aerosmith and Run DMC cornered the "cool" in that market, and everyone since then is just copycatting. And besides, Justin Timberlake, YOU have plenty o' street cred all on your own! Robin Thicke, maybe not so much...

But in between the tired stuff, there were many shiny, bright spots of music genius. Jennifer Hudson, Adele, the afore-mentioned ensemble with Al Green, Coldplay...and then towards the end, the Grammy producers knocked me out AGAIN with B.B. King, Buddy Guy, John Mayer and Keith Urban again, doing Bo Diddly's tune! Any time I can see Keith Urban (who is my future ex-husband, by the way) is a treat, and two performances in one night, neatly bracketing each end of the show like a finely sculpted, hefty, smooth....hard.....(oh 'scuse me! kinda got lost there!) set of bookends - well, it just doesn't get any better. Frankly, their performance could have turned into a 30 minute blues jam, for my money!

All in all, last night's Grammy's delivered in a way it hasn't in years. Not too glitzy and over-produced, the producers for once just relaxed and let the music and performances speak for themselves. It seemed more like a great concert than some boring old awards show! Nice WORK!